Things have been weird weight wise for me this last 3 months.
Around April 10th I was 280, I had my 1 yr appointment 2 weeks early and I was getting ready for the Handfasting and stressing out, I dropped down to 274 (for about 5 mins) a week later and then with all the celebrating and stuff I was back up to 283 on the 7th of May. I then lost that weight to 270.4 last week and then weighing this week I am back up to 274.
Yes I know the body YoYo’s within a a handful of pounds but it is just stressing me out, first I had a pounds stall for three months where I lost lots of inches but no pounds then I lose 20 pounds, gain half of that back and lose that only to gain Half of THAT back. The point being is since the first of the year when I was about 300 pounds..(298 on Jan 8th) and 6 months later I am down only 26 pounds… that is 26 pounds after having 80% of my stomach removed and my guts rearranged and 6 months when I should of been losing hand over fist and have lost twice that amount. I am in the “prime losing phase” only just over a year out of WLS and the 18 month mark where everything is suppose to get harder is coming up FAST (4 1/2 months)
Weight loss since surgery 4-26-10 (starting at 412)
So today I call my surgeon’s office and ask if I can get a referral to the nutritionist and try to find a councilor who specializes in eating disorders, because yes that is what I have. Earlier this week I had a corn dog, well I bought a corn dog, one of my favorite pre-WLS foods and one guaranteed to make my guts rebel and I ate about half of it on the way home and thought “oh well corn dogs are the perfect bad snack, it comes with it’s own puke stick so I can just vomit when I get home”
I threw the rest of the corn dog out the window and yes when I got home I tried to throw up but my guts are determined and wouldn’t let me, my mind is still bulimic in times of stress but my body wont agree.
I have to accept that yes I am a carbs addict, and yes I still have food/behavioral issues that could kill me, cause I do know I dont ever plan to go back to being over 400 pounds, or even over 300, I could not handle it, and if I dont get this under control I will end up there or dead.